Finding Light in the Darkness

As the air cools and the leaves turn shades of amber and gold, I’m reminded of how the fall season pulls us inward. There’s something about this time of year that beckons us to pause, to reflect on where we’ve been, and to sit with the transitions in our lives. October is a particularly reflective month for me—it’s a time when many honour the loss of children and loved ones, and although my own loss of baby Clara Rose happened in April (2011), I feel a sense of connection during this time. It’s a tender reminder that none of us walk this journey alone.

The changing seasons mirror the ebb and flow of grief. Just as the leaves fall and the earth prepares to rest, grief asks us to shed layers, to rest in our sorrow, and to make space for what comes next. But unlike the predictability of the seasons, grief has no timetable. It can surprise us in quiet moments or overwhelm us in waves, and learning to live with it is a process—one that doesn’t have an end point.

People often ask me how I got into this work—how I came to create retreats and workshops around healing and hygge. For me, it wasn’t a business decision; it was a personal calling. After losing my daughter, Clara Rose, I needed something that would help me survive the unbearable. Hygge became my refuge. It wasn’t about “moving on” from grief, but rather, it became about finding small moments of peace in the midst of it—lighting a candle on the darkest days, taking a quiet walk in nature, or finding comfort in the warmth of a bath. These acts didn’t “fix” my grief, but they allowed space for healing.

Tip 1 - Create Intentional Moments of Comfort

When you’re feeling overwhelmed by grief or life transitions, small acts of self-care can make a big difference. Whether it’s lighting a candle, taking a hot bath, or simply wrapping yourself in a cozy blanket, creating these small moments of comfort can help soothe your mind and body. Hygge is about creating space for yourself—space to feel, space to breathe, and space to just be.

Tip 2 -  Embrace Nature’s Healing Power

There’s something deeply healing about spending time in nature. Whether it’s a walk through the woods, sitting by a lake, or just breathing in fresh air, nature has a way of grounding us. It reminds us of the cycles of life, the changes in the seasons, and the beauty in letting go. Try to take regular walks in nature, even if they are short. It’s not about the destination; it’s about being present in the moment.

Hygge, for me, is about embracing both the light and the dark. It’s about creating a safe, comforting space where we can sit with our grief while also inviting in moments of joy, no matter how fleeting. It’s the quiet practice of tending to ourselves in a way that feels authentic—whether that’s wrapping yourself in a soft blanket, taking time to listen to soothing music, or simply breathing deeply in a moment of stillness.

Tip 3 - Set Boundaries with Your Grief

Grief has a way of showing up unannounced. Sometimes, it’s helpful to set boundaries around it. For example, give yourself permission to grieve, but also give yourself permission to take breaks from it. Create a time or space each day where you allow yourself to fully feel your grief—whether it’s through journaling, meditation, or simply sitting in silence. Once that time has passed, allow yourself to step back and focus on other things, knowing you’ve made space to process.

When I create retreats, I don’t do it from a place of expertise (I am not a therapist), but from a place of experience. I’ve walked the path of grief, and I continue to walk it every day. Hosting these retreats allows me to honour baby Clara’s memory, to carry her spirit forward by helping others navigate their own journeys of loss, healing, and self-discovery. It’s not about perfection—it’s about creating a space where we can be exactly who we are, no matter where we are on our healing path.

Tip 4 - Connect with Others Who Understand

Grief can feel incredibly isolating, but connection is a powerful healer. Surrounding yourself with people who understand your journey can make all the difference. Whether through retreats, support groups, or one-on-one conversations, seek out spaces where you feel safe to share your story, where your grief is honored, and where you can find comfort in community.

In November, I’m co-hosting a Hygge Healing Retreat with Amanda Carson a trained specialist in grief therapy. This retreat holds a special place in my heart because it’s designed for women to come together in a safe, nurturing space where we can share our stories, laugh, cry, and grow. It’s an invitation to reflect on how we can bring light into the darkness and find moments of joy, even in our deepest pain. We’ll spend time in nature, connect through Sound Healing, and nurture ourselves with gentle practices that invite peace and reflection. This retreat isn’t about forgetting or “moving on”—it’s about learning to live with our grief in a way that honours ourselves and those we’ve lost.

Tip 5 - Practice Rituals to Honour Those You’ve Lost

One of the most healing things we can do is create rituals to honour our loved ones. Lighting a candle, saying a prayer, writing a letter, or simply sitting in reflection can be powerful ways to keep their memory alive. These rituals don’t have to be elaborate—they just need to feel meaningful to you. By incorporating small, regular rituals, you can create a space where your grief is acknowledged, and your loved one is remembered.

What I’ve learned over the years is that healing isn’t linear. There will always be moments of darkness, but within that darkness, there are also opportunities for light. The light might look like a flickering candle, a hug from a friend, or a quiet walk through the trees. It’s in those moments that we remember we don’t have to carry our grief alone.

So, as October unfolds and the world around us shifts, I invite you to find your own moments of reflection, healing, and peace. Whether through nature, a quiet bath, or simply sitting with your thoughts, know that this season—like all seasons—offers opportunities for growth and renewal. And if you find yourself needing a space to connect and heal, know that you’re always welcome in the communities we create together.

Sending warmth, light, and hygge your way this fall.